LUCK

I walk head high..
Into the room where there is all light..
With plans and strategies..
And a will to 'lose'..
And then..strikes..
LUCK..
minus the good..
Some sin..
Some sign..
Some ugly chime..
That is when..realization strikes..
A single tear..takes away..
A thousand smiles..
The head now hung low..
And.. An agitated mind..

To.. My Kite Runner..Manal..:)

"For you.., a thousand times over."
I remember those times, when your hair style was very popular, for being untidy,
atleast in the A and C sections. :P
Back then, you were only a batch-mate who took the same bus as me.
Then, we took the same 'Science' stream, and we became what we called 'Friends' and what other jealous people called 'you-know-what'! :D
And then, we took the streets of Mayur Vihar too seriously.
All those childish Aakash and BT incidences,
A really intersting 2007 with many new developments in both our lives,
Laughing away to glory,
Talking continuously,
Complicated Connections,
Studies,
Unlimited Fun,
All come rushing back to me today.
The streets of 'Mayur Vihar' will miss you..
The 'Chowmein' of 'Aggarwal Sweets' will miss you..
The 'Juice-Wallah' of 'DPS complex' will miss you..
The 'Uncle Chips' will miss you..
The 'Cola Candy' of 'Mother Dairy' will miss you..
The 'Momos' you neve liked will miss you..
'Eat Out' will miss you..
All the three 'Earring-Wallahs' will miss you..
'Popli-Recharge' will miss you..
'Chocolate Cafe' will miss you..
'Samachar Complex' will miss you..
'Mayur Vihar Phase I Metro Station' will miss you..
I...will MISS YOU..!

PASSION...

Everywhere I search for you...
Your words..and your silence too...
This bruise so deep...so mean...
Hurts more and more...
Every time I breathe...
Come...Heal me...
Come...Feel me...
My fear...my wish...my fantasy...
My soul rests in agony...
I feel like I am deep inside the sea...
Salt burning my wounds...
No mercy...
Plunging me into deeper grief...
The water reminds me of life...
The darkness my decay...
Your touch is what I crave for...
Come...Take me away.....

VANITY...

Black...Blue...Red...
All there..
Purples...and Greens...
Add to the assets...
A closet of 365 dresses...perhaps more...
Lets move a little towards the door...
There comes a box...
Full of weird things...
I don't really understand...
Where it all fits...
A stick...
Long and colorful...
And another..and Another...
Then come the paint brushes...
All sizes...and colors...
Bottles of various shapes...
All labeled with exotic names...
A thousand things here and there...
When everything is correctly placed...
A hundred faces turn and sway...
A life...so colorful...certainly...
But One Day..when it all breaks...
I think I do not need words to potray...!

Paa!

Today...
I remember those times....
When my wishes were granted as soon as I spelt them...
I remember those shopkeepers who asked me to pick anything..
They knew 'Papa paise denge' (My Father would pay)..:D
I remember struggling to keep my cycle straight..
And Him running behind me all the way..
I remember getting those badminton strokes right..
After hours of tiring Him out..
I remember those hours of night..
Spent entertaining me..just for a smile..
I remember the thousand captured memories..
Me being the 'mega-model'..!
I remember the fights I always ended up winning...
I remember returning home..angry..and irritated..
And the aroma that awaited...
I remember the tears He wiped away..
I remember all the laughter..
All those jokes..
Invented only for us...!
The endless laugh..in the middle of the night..
Infinite support..Infinite Love..
And...Infinite Smiles!


Love You Paa...! :)

A..B..C..D

I saw her running across crowded roads and the busy town...
With a hope so high.. and the shine in her eyes..
Confident.. that the world will guide!
She skips..she hops..she jumps..she shifts!
And in the end a hand she lifts..

The light turns Green..
And the cars pass by..
Each owner..
only just saw the sight..

Hope still alive..
And the next Red light..
And again..she laughs..
The same old style..


A childhood so harsh..
A world too wide..
Yet she only..
Remains a small little scar..
To the world's eyes!


People reach out..
No one..but..manages to touch her hand..
The only thing they can part with..
Is a piece of their land..


She needs..
Not a hand...
But..a part of their lives..
And the busy world has..for her..
Only a sad smile..


The Days pass by...
The Weeks pass by..
She only dances to the tune..
Of the honking vehicles nearby..


I wish..i could..
Make a difference..Bring a change..
But..like all others..
I only pass the blame..
Tell me one soul..
Who can hug her tight..
I know..
I am a part of the crowd..
Which says..It cares..
Only when there is some boredom lingering by....

THE WOMAN

"Bhaiyya! Metro Station jaoge?"
"Haan Madam, baitho baitho!"
"Aao Aao! 12-22! Gol Chakkar! Gol Chakkar! Gol Chakkarr-r!"
"Baitho Bhaisahab! Aap aage a jao! Madam..aap peeche baitho!"
"Jaldi! Jaldi!"
Brrrrrrruuuuuuu....Bbbbrrrrrrrrrr..Bddddrrrrrrrrrrrr....!
"Baitho Baitho!"
"Aage peeche ho jao! Baitho..jaldi!"
"Kaha baithaega bhaiyya? Jagah kaha hai?"
"Arre bhai! ek pe chaar chaar baith-te hain!"
"Ladiez hain..kitna aage peeche karvaega?"
"Arre bhaisaab..rozi roti hai..din mein kitna kamate hain..usme ye sab kaise dekhenge!?"
"Tu chal..main tujhe do sawari ke paise deta hun! Chal Chal!"
"Hume police walo ko dena hota hai..hume itna kum bachta hai..usme kya kya karenge!"
"Jaane do..ab hume kahin jana hai..toh adjust karna padega..ab toh aadat pad gayi!"
"Wo hi toh Madam..hum hi in sab cheezon ke liye jagah dete hain..fir hum hi bolte hain..!"
"Kya karein..ab sabko itni jaldi hai..toh koi in sab mein nahi padta.."
"Subah..office time pe pohonchna hota hai..shaam ko..bache wait kar rahe hote hain ghar pe.."
"Adjust karna padta hai..sab jhelna padta hai!"
"Wo toh hai..ab ye auto wale bi kya karein..unki baat bi sahi hai...paanch rupae ek sawari ke milte hai..usme bi adha police walo ko de dete hain..becharo ke pas kitna bachta hai..!"
"Ek baar..maara tha thappad ek bande ko..seedha ghar pe bhaiyya ko phone aya tha police station se..bol rahe the..kaisi behen hai..ladko pe haath uthati hai..ye sikhaya hai aapne..dhyan rakhiye zaraa.."
"ab kuch karo bi toh aisa sunne ko milta hai...aur kuch bolo toh..aur log saath dene se rahe.."
"Toh bas..apni zarurat hai..toh..kuch nahi kar sakte.."
Burrrrrrrrr...Budddddrrrrrrrrrr.....rrrrrrrrr...!
The WOMAN...subdued!
She has the power to bear...
But..remember..she can rise! Rise...to extremely dangerous levels!
It's sad to see the plight of women all around..
Where we live..is Heaven!
We hardly get to know..what happens outside our shell..
We have so many people..who guide us..take care of us..at every step..
But..there lies..a world beyond!
A world where..a woman..has to struggle everyday..to reach home safe and sound!
There are women who kill their ambitions for the fear of having to bear the consequences!
There are women..who..inspite of all the odd things that happen to them in crowded buses, trains, shared autos, metros..stay silent..and move on!
There are woman..who are not even allowed to go out..because of the 'brutal' forces that are waiting to attack them..if they see light!AND..there are women..who FIGHT back!
Those..who tell men..they can stand brave and dignified and confident!
!Be the latter! Stand up for yourself!
Even if the world does not!
And..to all the men for whom..'Respect' does not exist in the dictionary!
A woman is the one who makes you complete!
A woman can step ahead of you..trip you over!
And if she does that! You will have to go into hiding!
She is the one..who is emotionally strong..physically calm..and mentally focused!
Don't disturb the calmness! Or else, you will have to pay!
Respect Her!
PS : Stop killing the girl child, Start allowing her to FIGHT!

To MANAL...!!

This one was written by me..a looooooong time back..for Manal! :)

Something New..Something Old..
Anything I think Of..Has to be told..
For hours together..Discussions go..
Be there some reason..Or no more..
Whenever I am sad..I look for you..
Whenever I am happy..I treat you too..
Don't know..Where I would stand without you..
My fears..You throw away..
My tears..You blow away..
You make me realise my mistakes..
And give me all the courage..
You recognize all my emotions..
My every thought..My every action..
I can never imagine a day sans you..
To you..I raise a toast..CHEERS!
Thankyou!

MUSIC!

Saa..Re...Ga...Ma...Pa...Da...Ni...Saa!

A drop of rain..falling on the window..
A waterfall..crashing down a cliff..
A river..eroding away..the soil..
The cry of a baby..
in distress..or pain..
The laugh of madness..
or of gain..
The wind around the trees in the meadow..
The sound of the cooler..in the afternoon heat..
The cracking of ice..
The breaking of wood..
The passionate sigh..
The mysterious chuckle..
Even the tractor on the field..
The farmer's sorrow..and grief..
The tap left running..
A mother's scolding..
The bird's chirp..
The monkey's actions..
The generator..
when the light goes out often..
The food cooking..
people looking..
An afternoon walk..
And..the shadow stops..
The thunder of the sky..
The bottle of Wine..
And anything..that ever stirs fine..
Even the silence..
when there are no words to say..
MUSIC..is alive..all the way!

Whenever I feel...
Good...or Bad...
Or..Happy...or Sad...
Or..Stupid...or Intelligent...
Or..Mad...or Sane...
Or..Low...or High...
Or..Drunk...or Alright!

I SING aloud.....even if anyone minds! :)

Of Trains...and Good-Byes!

The Hazrat Nizamuddin Railway Station....sound of the engine....porters shouting...'sahab kaunsa plaetform??'...their red color turbans...the strong smell of ammonia...luggage...people counting their bags over and over again..1..2..3...15..16...food bag...footwear bag...'paan' stains...dogs lying around...chaa-ain and paper soap wale bhaiyyas flying around...book stalls...nescafe's...beggars sleeping...children peeping...And..the train itself..of-course! INDIA! So much life in a Railway Station.! One can find almost everything..and anything there!
All from materialistic things...to the pain of seperation...you can't help..but marvel at the sight and plight of the Indian Railway Station! And..yeah..rarely does anyone buy a platform ticket! :D
Oh..and i don't think many people know..what that is..!

The young couple happily going for their honeymoon..
to the Old couple going back in tears after visiting their daughter!
Their hugging their grand children..and saying.."Mumma ko pareshaan mat karna.."!
The college people..going on some trip..
All excited and enthusiastic...!
The family going on a much needed holiday..
looking all tired..after so much of work..
surely..they will return all energetic and fresh!
The stern and frustrated looking Uncle..
going on some Business trip...
He won't budge from the window seat...whatever happens! :x
The relatives dropping their relatives...
Discussing the stay..
Saying..don't go...it was so much fun!
Saying..we will miss you!
Saying..why the hell do holidays get over!
The upside-down smiles!
And..in extremities..a single tear..from the left eye!
Promises to come back...
Promises to meet soon...

The Station certainly has a life of it's own!

With Promises...Sighs...Tears...and...Smiles! :)

AN ODE...

So..one more semester over! for most of you..it would mean..an end to the tiring assignments..tutorials etc etc. But..for me..it means..an year closer to the end of an era! :( an year closer to the end of WONDERFUL college life..!
We all have grown..(yes! and i don't mean..in height)..we now think different..! dream different! look different! walk different!
This time..i remember..no one apart from me shouted 'MY BIRTHDAY'S COMING' months before it actually came..! i would do that this year also..mind it people! :P
We've stopped fussing over stupid things..!!
We've stopped the non-stop talks over the phone!!
We've grown out of complains..demands..ego-clashes..and lots more!!
Our brains work differently now!!
And..all because..we now BOND so very well with each other that there is no way..we can miss out on anyone's emotions!
We do not feel the need to communicate..because we already know..what actually is going on in someone's mind..!
This time..it has all been about evolving into different indviduals..yet being the same!
Made many new friends..
Got to know so many new people..
Made new bonds..
Broke free from old grudges..pain!
Laughed more..frowned less!
Made new experiences..
Captured new moments..
Faced the Unexpeected..
And collected...
Thousands of memories!!


PS: i know this was weird!! i don't know why this shaped up the way it has..i had meant to write something else..but..the result was this!
Don't just comment..write your most memorable moment too!!

And i tag......
Parul Berry
Neha Chauhan
Parinita Sharda
Piyush Khatreja
Nitish Punyani
Piyush Jalan
Nitish Jha
Navneet Singh
Naman Sachdeva
Naman Vij
Nikhil Kataria
and their Brownie! :P
Nayan Dowerah
Akansha Gosain
Aditya Kaushik
Akshara Trilok

DRUNK

This is one of my old poems.
And no..i am not depressed or anything..
And as i have already said..I believe in impulses..this is an outcome of one such impulse!

The world ends here..
I throw away all my fears..
From here begins a new journey..
Lost all hope..there is only glee..
Alone I go forth..
Flickering lights all along I see..
I can't think..neither can I feel..
Swaying to the music..inside me..
Nothing else bothers me..
I walk on..
And on..
All there is..
Is ecstacy..!!

UNCERTAIN

when the morning is all dark..
when the sun hides behind the clouds..
when the night is just peeping out..
and when the train whistles aloud..
when hard work becomes too hard..
and when applause alone does not count..
when everything seems alright..
bringing with it another cry..
when a lonely hand stretches out..
when again and again everything starts..
when the tears are only about to fall..
when the end is always far..
when the pain is hard to bear..
SMILE..
and say..
"life is here"!

INCOMPLETE

Those eyes...
i dont look into...
tell a story every time i steal a look...
and it hurts to think it is true...
a hundred dreams..
a thousand wishes..
only to be remembered..
or..maybe forgotten too..
everything can't be completed..
that's what the world teaches..
dreams..
become wishes..
wishes..
become memories..
and..memories..
become..LIFE!

OUR DREAM

To Manal..and recently..Parul and P2 and Neha have been on it...!
One Day..one beautiful rocking day..
.....................................................................
An Open Jeep...military green...modified to look classy..rough..cool..hot..all at the same time..
No unwanted carvings or designs on the sides..A big no-no!
Only one single word spray painted on one side..in a normal font..nothing too big..nothing too small!
Everyone inside the jeep in 'Black'..Deep Purple accessories! Ha!
Aaaaaaaaannnnndddddd...attitude! whoa!
And...we flick past towns and cities..
In our trademark..our Jeep!
And..when we stop....
Every face turns around! Lights...cameras...people (too early to call 'em fans! :P)
More..and more people!
Red carpet...Open stadium!
Speakers..Lights!
We climb onto the stage....!
And like all other times..no need to find our way..
The path...the stage..everything else finds 'US'!
....................................................................................
"Hello....everyone!
Show me..you are ready to 'Rock'!
Ready...to rock along...!"

Crowd : "yyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss"

"Louder"

Crowd: "yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss"

"Okay then......"

*Guitar Plays......*
*Drums stay.......*
*The crowd sways.....*

"So..my friends...
welcome...welcome to OUR WORLD..."

On the guitar....as you all know...is ____________!
Crowd: "wwwwwwwwwooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwww"
Holding the drum sticks...is.._______________!
Crowd:"yyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy"
And...here with me!
is...._______________________!
Crowd:"yaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhooooooooooooooooooo!"

And...we take over the stage...capturing every thought..every emotion!

The blanks are all yet to be filled!
And..will be filled very soon!
The single word to be painted is yet to originate!
Wait for it people!

PS: Back to reality!

As i always say.....DREAM....and DREAM BIG..!

THE UNANSWERED!

Why is there a 'WHY' to everything..!?!
Why should every action, every thought be questioned?
Why can't the mind silently make a choice?
Why can't the heart ever try?
Why do people need answers?
Why does every forehead frown upon a change?
Why can someone not be different?
Why can one not follow thier thoughts?
Why can't i choose my way?
Why can't i make a mistake?
Why should I regret all that i say??

Every day..is a new way..
Every path..a different one..
Every second..there are new thoughts..

We might make decisions too fast..that they dont last..but..these decisions are the ones that make up a life..these are the ones that are truly 'yours'..

'Impulse' aint a useless word..it means..strength..strength to bear a decision..forever!
Everyone must have made wrong decisions..But that doesn't mean..the decision has to be questioned every moment??

Each mistake brings with it precious moments..moments of happiness..sorrow..love..friendship..success..failure..betrayal!

I accept my mistake!
I accept the mistake as an experience!

Today..i was asked..'WHY'?
And all i wish to say is..'because i felt like'!

I LIKE!

i like the first drop of rain..falling towards me..engulfing me..in ecstasy!
i like the smell of wet mud..and walking through it..getting all the dirt...
i like to run all the way to my bus-stop..forgetting the traffic..for saving my bucks...(metro is expensive!)
i like to use a single punch-able id card to get in..and reminding my partner-in-crime to thank God!
i like it when PB..PK..PS and NC think they are the best..because i agree with them COMPLETELY!
i like it when NP and PJ hit me back..because i like making faces at them after that!
i like it when we curse those HYPOCRITES..in our class!
i like it when i am called a south-indian..and told i am 'chant' and reminded every now and then about my 'short'-ness..because in the end..they all still love me the same!
i like it when we all stand side by side for anything and everything!
i like it when i come back home knowing spicy food is eagerly waiting for me to come back!
i like talking..to my family! about everything under the sun!
i like it when i wait for Tuesday on Monday..and for Wednesday on Tuesday..and for Thursday on Wednesday..and for Friday on Thursday!
but..on Friday..i like to wait for Monday..and on Saturday..i like to wait for Monday..and on Sunday..i like to wait for Monday yet again!
i like waiting for my phone to ring...!
i like thinking about lazing around on weekends!
i like to be busy..ALL the time!
i like to walk and walk and walk...!
i like to sing all the while i talk...!
and not let MS talk at all...!
i like to dream..BIG!!
i like to reach..the IMPOSSIBLE!!
i like........this LIFE a lot!!

WITH LOVE....

As i sit in front of this COMPUTER..something which i was introduced to..almost 17 years ago..i look back at life and the people who have helped me walk through..to reach where i stand today..and when i mention them..i only have respect for them!

They have been with me forever..i write this post as a token of love for them! To remind everyone..how important these people are! I take you back..in TIME!

A 'bundle of joy' was deposited into Her arms..some twenty years ago..She was the first one to hold me..to kiss me..to welcome me into this world! From the day i was born..i was her sweetheart..her everything..she loved me more than anything..she was the one who taught me how to love nature..how to admire the pigeons..how to give them grains of rice..how to love 'rasam'..how to help everyone no matter how good or bad they are..how to take a step ahead..how to see the positive..how to live life..how to love life! She was someone who understood me..my thoughts..my actions..even before i could..she could not see me hurt..she could not see me lose..so..she taught me to be a WINNER..always! I SALUTE HER!

A..B..C..D..E..F........Z I could say that in the reverse order as fast as the other way round..i could spell 'pneumonia' at the age of four..i could solve mathematical 'magic squares' at the age of five..He is the one responsible for it..I can string words together..i can write this blog..all because of him..he taught me courage and responsibility..he imparted to me..all the knowledge he could! It is because of him..i think of standing independent today..of breathing FREE..of being CONFIDENT enough to face everything that comes by! I SALUTE HIM!

My Grandfather and my Grandmother..my thatha and patti..my nana and nani..whatever you say..they were two souls..without whom..i could not have been what i am today! Though i still believe..they guide me! I miss them! I wish i could have told them how much I love them! But..before I could grow 'big' enough to know all this..they decided to rest in peace..to leave..for their heavenly abode!

with love..

THANKYOU!!